How can you tell a chick on the street is a hooker? Well, for one thing, she will probably be dressed in something flashy. Now, do not make the mistake of just letting this little clue be your guide because in this day and age, a lot of women dress like hookers. Here's another clue to incorporate: She will probably be showing a little cooze or nipple, too. You know, kinda like a window display at a department store. A hooker knows how to advertise what goods she has for sale. And finally, when you approach a hooker, she is always happy to see you. Well, not you, but your monetary potential. You see, to a hooker, you are just another dollar sign, but don't take it personally. Feel free to treat her like just another twat. Check out our hooker friend, Daphne. She is sure calling a lot of attention to herself in this red number. Upon closer inspection, you notice that you can actually see her huge mounds through the lacy material of her dress. And when you lower the window, she comes up and is all smiles. That is how you know she is a hooker. Now when she fucks and sucks this guy dry and still has that shit-eating grin on her face...that's how you know she is a good hooker. And you can feel free to pat her on the back and kick her right out, like a good John.

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No matter how unfair it seems, sometimes hookers get busted and hauled off to jail. We know, it just doesn't make sense, considering the public service they provide. But it happens, regardless. But if a hooker is street smart and stacked, she can be in and out of jail in no time. Just check out Sarah Sunshine. She knows that the only ace in the hole that she has is her ability to drain a cock in no time flat, so she used that to her advantage, offering the officer on duty her hooker booty. And who could say no to a thorough cock-sucking and tight pussy? Some people have a get-out-of-jail-free card, and some people, like Sarah, have a get-out-of-jail-free cunt.

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Trust us when we say that we know what it's like to be cranky, frustrated and in need of some stress-relief. Sometimes a guy's gotta go blow off some steam, you know, take it easy and just relax. And there are three or so ways of doing this. The first is a little miracle we like to call BEER. Except if you spend too much time with beer, you wind up with a headache and a gut. The second is a great invention called SPORTS. Except you can lose time, effort and even some cash on sports and it usually goes hand in hand with beer. The last is the best way of all; PUSSY. Pussy is a great way to blow off steam and even your wad. The thing is, pussy isn't always available, attainable or even around. Not to worry. That's why hookers were invented. Hookers are like the Chinese food of pussy; quick, reliable, always available via delivery, not so hard on the budget and after you have a lot of it, you can always have just a little more. Don't believe it? Check out Soleil Hughes' and her hookertastic performance in this video. She shows up, fucks, get paid and goes. It's perfect. So next time you are a little bit stressed and need some relief, just put your dick in a hooker, they always hit the spot!

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In the year 2060, you will no longer have to go out on the hunt for tits and cunt. Why? Because in the year 2060, the hookers come and find you. Isn't that nice? So imagine you are minding your own business and you suddenly have the urge for a sloppy blowjob and some experienced poontang. All you have to do is put out the alert and the hooker closest to you will come and lay it down. It's kind of like when you need a plumber or a handyman and you call one in for a service call, except a hooker of the future will service your cock. Watch Carly, a pretty blonde hooker, fuck and suck this guy like it's no big deal. We can't wait until the day this fantasy becomes reality. It's a nice thing to imagine when thinking about the future. Puts a spin on the idea of cumming attractions.

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It should be obvious by now that chicks like dudes with money, man. They gravitate to big wallets... well... like you gravitate to big tits. When a chick sees a guy who has enough dough to keep her in a comfortable fashion she gets the equivalent of a boner. And that chick boner will lead her to give up anything and everything to be a rich dude's main squeeze. For example, our big-boobed gal here, Summer Sinn, is not very interested in this average Joe until she realizes that he has the big bucks. Then she is willing to bend over backwards to accommodate his needs. They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas and in this case, what happens in Vegas is that Summer fucks and sucks this guy until he blows his wad on her tits. The lessons we learn here is ALWAYS bet on stacked, because big titted bitches will always put out for dough and that money can't buy you happiness, but it will buy you a big-tit hooker, and that is almost as good.

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There's nothing like a little kink to make sex better. Especially when you can get kinky with as hot a piece of ass as Daphne Rosen. Daphne is the total package: She is smart, has a great personality and she is the freakiest sex fiend you can find. This girl does it all. So when this guy wanted to experiment with some nipple clamps, she was all for it. When he whipped out the whips and chains, Daphne whipped out his cock and went to town. When he told her that he wanted to fuck her tits and her pussy and then finish off with his cock in her ass, she agreed wholeheartedly. And when he told her that he wanted to spray her down with his nut sauce she told him to do it. Because Daphne knows that the only thing better than being a big-titted cock fiend is being a big-titted cock fiend coated in cum.

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We live in a world of convenience and we like what we want, when we want it. For example, when you want a nice, juicy burger, you can just pull in to your local drive-thru and order it. If you want to pick up some prescriptions, you can just mosey on over to your local pharmacy's drive-thru and get your meds. So why not incorporate that into how we get ass? How convenient would it be to just pull up to a corner nearby and order up some juicy cooze to go? That's exactly what this guy does. He pulls up to choco-licious Stacy Adams, working her wares on the ave, and he says, "I'd like some mocha poon to go, please. And a side of titties, too, super-sized. Thanks." And she jumps into his car and then on his cock in the motel a few minutes later. And when he is done with his quickie, he tells her to book and that's because just like fast-food containers, hookers like Stacy are disposable. Doesn't that sound quick and easy? You betcha. All hookers should be quick and easy.

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When Kali tries on tight tops it's kind of difficult for her to stuff her huge hoots into them. She tries, though. But in the end, she can't contain them and they bust right out of their constrictive prison. She uses the fact that she is topless to her advantage and decides to give her man a sloppy tit fucking. But all that titty fucking doesn't satisfy her fuck lust, so she hops on his cock and rides it, hard. Trying on tight tops is forgotten once this guy tries Kali's tight pussy on his dick. The lesson learned here is that less is more, meaning, the less clothes that Kali has on, the more dick she can get. We think that for all big-titted chicks, that is pretty much a rule to live by.

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Here is something almost unbelievable: Rich guys with millions of dollars need to hire hookers to get some action. (Yeah, cause the fact that they are rich just doesn't cut it with your average gold-digging slut. They have to pay for sex.) But, we are not going to argue with that since most chicks believe this to be true thanks to the magic of the movie "Pretty Woman". So in an effort to keep up that Cinderella-esque ideal that if a girl is pretty and charming enough, it overshadows the fact that she blows many, many cocks for money and a rich guy will save her from the streets. Let's pretend that Kianna Dior is a hooker with a heart of gold who merits some rescuing. Kianna comes across a rich guy who has a limo that he is willing to let her rest her tired tootsies in. (It's rough pounding the pavement and getting your pussy pounded, too.) So, being the overly grateful streetwalker that she is, Kianna decides to show him her gratitude with the only thing she has to offer a rich guy...her hooker pussy. Does he decide to whisk her away from all things hooker-like because of her prime, horny, pink clam and righteous cock-sucking skills? Hell, no! This isn't the movies. What he does do is promise her that he will be back next week for another romp in the limo with her. Hey, he didn't take her off the streets, but at least he is giving her a steady income, or rather cumming in her a lot.

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If you are a dude who has a best buddy, you are responsible for a few things. The first is lying for your buddy whenever he needs you to. If his ball and chain comes snoopin' around, you deny and lie until you die or at least get your friend on the phone to warn him. The second thing you are responsible for is breakin' your friends' balls at every opportunity. This is important as it builds character and is just plain funny. The last thing you are responsible for, and probably the most important thing of all, is getting your buddy some strippers for his bachelor party. And not just any run-of-the-mill-dancing-for-dollars stripper, either. Nope. You are responsible for getting him a hot slut who is going to drain his nuts of every last drop of his single-man baby batter. A slut like Holly Halston. This stripper takes it up her slutty snatch, in the mouth and most-importantly, up her tight ass.
So remember, when the time comes to do right by your best bud, give him the gift that keeps on giving. Give him a big-tit hooker.

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